Things haven't progressed so well lately and in often I find that my frustrations are running high. I figured I was putting too much pressure on myself and trying too hard to make something happen in the studio, instead of letting things evolve. I realized by the end of the week that I had nothing to show for myself...not even any new fragment pieces, so it was clearly time to take a break. A slow, dawning realization hit me just about that time...why, I needed to read a book....input, food, nourishment....I was running quite on empty, which was part of the problem.
So, I gave myself time for some delicious naps and reading time on the front porch. Sometimes it's too sunny to sit on the back deck in the afternoon and lately I've come to feel the river as kind of a menacing presence, so I'd rather be in front. I have several books going at once, one of which is this latest Bill Bryson book, At Home, and of course, after lo, these many months, I'm still reading Swann's Way by Marcel Proust (almost finished though!). My new issue of Selvedge arrived on Saturday and that's always a delight for the senses.
Alas, just as I was really starting to relax about this whole Missouri River flooding saga, since we're still dry and the water releases are stable (still high but not going higher)....a really big storm came in the middle of the night last night and more erosion on the banks, rock down in the water and bare dirt in spots on a number of lots. More cash out to re-stabilize....it seems endless these days. I'm hoping to have a more cheery report in a few days!!!
You are so right! Reading on the front porch in the shade away from the river. Good decision. Be kind to yourself. You've been under the threat of flooding for a long time now and I'm sure you're tired both emotionally and physically.
ReplyDeleteYay for a good book! Nothing like it- I am trying to convince my youngest that books will be on the list of her bestest friends in the future! Hope the waters recede soon!XX
ReplyDeleteI love Selvedge too. I also have many books on the go and my husband never understands how l can remember them all.
ReplyDeleteThe constant fear of flooding and the pressure that you have been under has got to take a huge emotional, physical and mental toll. (I know that I would be wiped out.) Your instinct to put down the work, and sit with a few good reads is indeed wise. I hope everything settles down for you and that soon these concerns of water rising will be a distant memory.
ReplyDeleteCarole, Annamaria, Lynda and Victoria...I thank each of you for your comments, good wishes and support!! Things are better...that is, I'm in a better frame of mind today. Reading is so good for the soul! I actually was relaxed and in a flow in the studio today...yay!! Thank you all so much.
ReplyDeleteHi Patti - sometimes we need to stop and just be; let it all go by. Sounds like you took the time you needed and are having some nice rewards today. The relentlessness of the water and flood threat is very difficult; no let up; no release; just ongoing stress. Maybe you can schedule in some downtime each week to just relax and let go with a book!
ReplyDeleteWow, that was fast; so glad to hear that you are in a better frame of mind. Fiona said what I was going to say. I think we forget how human we are as we aspire to self-imposed standards that nag at us if we don't take that ego under control by releasing the attachments we make to goals and achieving. I, too, had to make the break yesterday, but I did it by "running away" for a couple of hours.
ReplyDeleteSo glad you're feeling like yourself again.
Patti, I'm glad you emerged from your enforced break triumphant! I've been taking some days off too this past week. No point pushing it when there is nothing there in the creative wells, however we feel we ought to be doing something. I too had a very productive day yesterday after being what I still feel the need to call "lazy!" When will we learn to give ourselves a break, when we clearly need a break? Be well, my friend.
ReplyDeleteFiona, Lorraine and Gabriella....we all need to take breaks and sometimes for whole days!! I know you all understand and I so appreciate your wonderful support. Whatever it takes to keep the flow going....thank you and hope you are each "in the creative flow"....remember to take a break though!
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