Of course, I knew the answer and here's what's happened. For decades after I finished school, I worked in the library at the art school I had attended...not knowing at the beginning that I would be there for 25 years. I kept thinking it would be until I figured out what else I wanted to do, but I was able to support myself in a job that fed my artistic spirit, surrounded by a community of artists, as I cataloged art books day after day. It was a long time before I realized that the job was allowing me to do something very important with my own work in the studio...play. We go through art school thinking that what we must want to do is make art and have it in galleries where people will buy it...that this is somehow the ultimate goal, knowing that if you are very fortunate, you can make a living off your work. I realized at some point during my tenure at Ringling College of Art and Design, that making a living from your work meant that you were under a certain pressure from the marketplace. I was free from that and although I showed my work in countless juried exhibitions over the years, there was never any pressure to do anything that didn't come naturally to me. Even that, understanding what comes naturally to you, takes a very long time to develop.
I don't work at that little dream job any longer...I left it when we moved to South Dakota. I made some trade-offs. I traded the security of a job that supported me financially and artistically, for all the time in the world to be in the studio....but I am subject now entirely to the marketplace in order to have any kind of income. For many years I said that I would keep making art, whether anyone ever saw it or not...that was kind of a test for me, whether you really had it in you....would you continue to make the work even if you didn't have the accolades, the encouragement and the pats on the back. I know that I will continue to make art, but it's different now...in some ways, my art making experience is much, much richer, because of the online relationships I've developed and that continue to grow. On the other hand, the lesson I must continue to work on....is letting myself play...because that's the only way I can make the work that is unique to me. And the next lesson is for me to trust the universe that the work will sell....I am very much involved in the marketplace and my life now is all about that balance.
I love random marks, surprise, layering, surface, chaos and a fair amount of disorder when making the work...I love it when things are not what they seem, because that's the lesson of life....look closely, there is always more and it's not always what you think. Cheers!!!
This little book is called Transluscent Days (named this very day!) and will appear in my shop in the next day or two.
